monologue

It's funny that when I sit down to write a blog post, it's difficult for me to look back on the last 48 hours or week & remember the storyline. The plot. The scenes in the episode.

I have always kept a journal or blog (as described in way too lengthy detail here) & when I read back through past entries, I'm taken aback by how much of my life I forget. Reading through my old Livejournal (yes, livejournal) a few nights ago, I came across an entry about an event day during my internship in 2008. I remembered the event, but did I remember that me & a volunteer got stuck in a paddleboat in the middle of the Elizabeth River 10 minutes before a crazy typhoon-like storm struck? No. & let me tell you, that is too hilarious of a memory to not have tucked away for a laugh. So, high-five, 2008-Kelsey-that-wrote-everything-down.

Or this entry, when Amelia & I taught a social media class this summer. In my half-asleep, exhausted stupor, I forgot to mention that after staying up half the night to perfect our presentation, I managed to leave half the tools we needed to GIVE said presentation as we walked out the door the next morning. Between me huddled in a corner of the room, trying to re-save the entire presentation in 10 minutes & Amelia having to fly back to her house, then getting stuck on the wrong side of a passing train on her way back, it was the absolute cluster-cuss that I've come to expect in my every day life. However, the presentation then went off without a hitch, aaaand cue Meredith Grey-esque voiceover monologue about friendship & growing up. See? Episode.

& it's not just funny episodes that I want to remember.This week's episode would probably, once again, be a lesson in patience. I think this is somewhat of a theme on this little blog, as both Jared & I are 25 & in life-limbo. He's not really done with school yet, I don't really have my dream job yet, we rent an apartment & we're still looking for an opportunity to move, in search of our forever-city. Most mornings, I wake up with the day seeming to have a big, dark cloud lingering above it, inscribed with "FUTURE" written across it in some horrible Microsoft Word font, like Chiller. It's in my nature to plan, & to worry when there isn't a plan. 

Of course, if this were an episode about patience & our future, it would end with a glimpse into "5 years from now..."  & in my heart of hearts, I KNOW that 5 years from now involves our roots being planted into some yard, in the form of what I hope to be a lemon tree.

So, for someone that is constantly worrying about the future, it's good to reflect on the recent (& sometimes not so recent) past. It's cathartic to look back on my day/week & make sense of the things I was brought to. How did I handle them? What did I learn? Even if there isn't a conclusion or lesson, there's at least the funny moments to store away forever. I want to be more purposeful in my life. More reflective - More in tune with what I'm being taught... & then storing that lesson for the inevitable day that I've forgotten it.

I'm blabbering. I'm also procrastinating. I have an event to work tomorrow & then we're making our annual visit to Busch Garden's halloween craziness on Sunday, so it would behoove me to get my last day of office productivity started. I've spent most of this morning stopping to smell the roses.

happy friday!

style // 03

chambray button-down - kohl's // pin - j.crew // earrings - uo // pants - h&m // heels - target

Happy October! OCTOBERRRR!!!! I love this month from my toes to my nose! I am an October baby through & through - This month just gets my blood a-pumpin'. Does everyone's birthday month seem sort of magical or is this just something that October people feel? Even though turning 25 is now only 10 days away (& I'm still a little mortified at that thought), I am so excited to celebrate some of my favorite people's birthdays & our big THREE YEAR (whattttt??) anniversary at the end of the month. It's going to be a month full of fun, & pumpkin & cider & maybe some tears over that whole 25-years-old thing, but that's fine. That is juuuuuust fine.

Also happening this month? Kohl's, at least one more time. I'm mad at every single one of you that didn't clue me in on the goldmine that awaited me inside that place... It was magical! Thanks for the chambray, Kohl's!

Other cool things that happened today - Drank a pumpkin chai latte & did not love it, so I can check that one off the list. Went to the doctor & navigated my way through an entire conversation about insurance and co-pays like an adult. Read this buzzfeed article in the doctor's waiting room & snorted (twice). Walked past a box on the sidewalk outside our apartment & had an 8-ish-year-old boy (Am I the only person that is TERRIBLE at guessing kid ages? I can't even speculate as to what age I was in 4th grade.) jump out of said box, scaring the beshnikes out of me while his younger brother videotaped the whole thing and managed to NOT curse. Came home to roses that are the prettiest shade of peach. Jammed out to Eminem's "Lose Yourself" because I just cannot control myself when that song comes on. Enjoyed happy hour at a local winery with a dear friend. & managed to spit a blog entry out before el husbo got home from work. I'd say my work here is done.

Just kidding, I also want to publicly declare my love & admiration to Wynter, my amazing hair stylist & favorite life-lover, who is making all of my blonde dreams come true this year. She is zeh behst!

the tire swing

My older sister stomped off in the opposite direction of the tire swing. I huffed & pushed my feet off the ground to get the swing moving again. The big branch that held it swayed a little less than it had when we both sat on it 2 minutes before our silly little argument. What was that argument about... How high the swing could go? Spinning vs. swinging? I really don't remember. The babysitter stood somewhere between the stomping feet & the swaying branch, looking back & forth between us before she moved closer to the swing.

"It's silly to fight with each other like that." She pushed the tire swing to give me the momentum that my 8-year-old legs were struggling to produce on their own.
"We always fight." I stated, matter-of-factly.
"Do you fight with your friends like that?"
"No. But they're my friends, not my sister. She isn't my friend." The sun was getting lower & lower, so I knew my outside playtime was coming to an end. I did not want to waste it discussing my older sister.
"I used to think that about my big sister. But now she's my best friend. You're going to grow up, & she's going to be one of the only friends that you keep forever."
"No, I don't think so. We don't really like the same stuff." I smiled because I knew better. I had at least six friends that I was going to keep forever. And two American Girl dolls, but that was besides the point.
"I think you'll be surprised. Just wait & see."

Later that night, I brushed my teeth & stood on my tiptoes. Standing on my tiptoes helped me imagine what grown-up Kelsey would look like. Obviously, I couldn't be shorter than everyone else forever, & the bathroom sink would be eventually be at my waist rather than my chest. What would my face look like? Would my hair be brown like my mom's by then? My sister & I had already forgotten about our earlier argument. It was time for us to help put our younger sister to bed & get ready for bed ourselves. I tried to imagine us both as grown ups. At one point, we had designed next door houses that were joined by a water slide...

We ended up with a new baby sister a few months later, & that made four. Four different girls, four strong personalities, four unique styles. There were many more arguments. Bigger arguments, more opinions, longer grudges. We are all so different & our opinions still differ SO greatly... & there's always a chance that someone is stomping off in the other direction. But they have lasted much longer than those six friends in 4th grade (& I can't even imagine what state the American Girl dolls are in) or even the tire swing. This conversation from nearly 17 years ago has stood out in my memory, though - It's a memory that has very vividly stayed with me & over the years, I've kept coming back to the babysitter's prediction, waiting for it to happen. & slowly, as we've all grown up, & the bathroom sink now sits at our waists, it has.

We're still growing up, but the babysitter was right. I have three of the wackiest friends that kind of look like me & that I would never pick out of a crowd. & they're here forever.

... So, that waterslide is definitely still an option.

Harry & Sally & tomato soup

Sally: Well, if you must know, it was because he was very jealous, and I had these days of the week underpants. 
Harry: Ehhhh. I'm sorry. I need the judges ruling on this. "Days of the weeks underpants"?
Sally: Yes. They had the days of the week on them, and I thought they were sort of funny. And then one day Sheldon says to me, "You never wear Sunday." It was all suspicious. Where was Sunday? Where had I left Sunday? And I told him, and he didn't believe me. 
Harry: What? 
Sally: They don't make Sunday. 
Harry: Why not? 
Sally: Because of God. 

The entirety of When Harry Met Sally is sort of the best, but it seems like every time I watch it, a new scene strikes me as funny that I never paid attention to before. Tonight, it was ^^ that one. For whatever reason, this is one of those movies that I have to watch at a certain time of year. There isn't anything overly autumnal about it, except for maybe its cover... In fact, it's probably technically a New Year's Eve movie. Facts aside, it's my ringing-in-fall movie. This is the first time since we've been married that Jared has watched it with me - I usually save it for the weekend of his annual boys' camping trip & cuddle up with some pinot grigio. But I felt simply awful all day today, so he brought me tomato soup, made me a grilled cheese & popped in my favorite rom-com. He's pretty good at turning rotten, ibuprofen-filled days around. He's also way more cuddly than any pinot I've ever met. I just adore him.

style // 02

glasses - warby parker // blazer - target // dress - banana republic (easter dress from 2012)

 bag, watch - francesca's  // bracelet - charlotte russe // heels - h&m

Fall has... fallen (?) here in sweet old Norfolk, Virginia. The past two mornings have been overcast, the afternoons are crisp, & right on cue, my throat is getting a little sore. I hear that pumpkin chai lattes fix sore throats, though, so I'm not concerned ;)

My rings are all sorts of wonky in that last photo because that's not my engagement ring, ha. We had a surprise opportunity to go paddleboarding with some of Jared's co-workers yesterday (which was SUPER fun but also omg my arms) & if you know me, you know that my engagement ring does not go to the beach. It usually doesn't work events with me, & it definitely doesn't hang out when I'm painting or staining. It's funny, because I know a lot of girls that don't take their engagement ring off for NUTHIN'... & some that won't sleep with it on or wear it in the shower. To each lady their own, right? I have a couple of "substitute" rings that help get the yes-I'm-definitely-married-kbye point across, one of which is a turquoise ring (half pictured above) from Jared's abuela. It doesn't really fit, but it sure is pretty. I'm really terrible at remembering to swap my rings back until I've gone out the next day & get annoyed by my faux ring not fitting.

I'm off to try to finish this Monday off with a serious bout of productivity. My sister-in-law spent her Monday morning giving birth to 9 whole lbs. of an adorable baby boy (CONGRATS, HEATHER & LEVI!), so no matter what I do, I cannot top that. We have so many kiddos in our family now! It's a fun thing to watch our siblings' grow their little families, & with each new little niece or nephew, we get more pumped to join them in the family growing someday. But for now! We have a lone succulent that we usually forget to water & a super high maintenance flokati rug, so that's basically a baby. Or something.

Here's to the first week of fall, wonderful fall!